Author Archive | yazminh

The Deception of Facts

Although meant to be comical, my last post showed how our past experiences, the “evidences” from which we place a value for making future decisions, can affect the quality of our lives, because it affects how we respond to the world.

I grew up in a very Catholic, somewhat Americanized, Asian household = belief in the fair gamut of the unscientific.  My best friend grew up in a non-religious, very traditional Asian household = maybe some superstitions but nothing with conviction.  She went into the very scientific world of medicine; I went into the possibilities gateway of education (before I meandered onto the threshold of Where Dreams Come True, where I presently stand).

Throughout the years, we’ve each experienced traumatic events that have affected some of our beliefs today, whether on a conscious or unconscious level, and thus, have affected some of our actions and decisions accordingly.

I will share more of my story as we go along, but I want you to consider what life events happened to you that may be the source of why you do the things you do, or the source of your fears in life: what things were you told, did you witness, were you taught to “never forget” in order to be safe/loved/worthy?

Know that those messages of guilt-guided obligations, those lessons of yesteryear’s fear factors, are FALSE.

This is not to say that there is no truth in the past, but that the past has no weight-bearing truth in the present; it only bears the amount of weight today that you allow it to.  Worse, the further you carry it, the more the weight fuses into you: you shape your arm muscles around this giant rock, and they stiffen, fossilize so you can keep hanging on to it as seamlessly as possible.  And you agonize and blame the journey for being so difficult, slow, uneventful, unfortunate, all while voluntarily carrying this load.

Well, LET IT GO.

Let it go, and take a stretch.  Things might hurt a little, feel a little funky, but what do you expect—you’ve been carrying this tremendous burden, hunchbacked and gnarl-knuckled, for all this time!   Feeling strange – it’s good, particularly if the familiar was not good.  Stretch your arms wide and high towards the sky.   Lift up your chin to the light.  Take a slow, deep, delicious breath.

That is you,
coming back to life,
disbelieving facts,
having faith.

Welcome home.

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Kintsukuroi

Kintsukuroi

I found this on a friend’s sister’s FB page a while back and loved it so much that I’ve had it sitting on my desktop all this time, waiting for somewhere to place it, and now I give it to you.

Fill your renewed self with something pure and nourishing, and use yourself as a vessel to give to others.

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Everything is a Disclaimer

“I have had no professional training…” – William Hung, 2004 Contestant of “American Idol”

What makes William Hung so endearing is his unblinking disillusionment or otherwise disconnection, by default or design, from society’s view of him.

Over the past decade, I have created several blogs with unsuccessful follow-thru, and I realize now why I was afraid to commit:  I was scared.

What if I fail miserably because I have had no professional training and am disillusioned by what I think the world wants?  What if I let my audience down because I do not execute perfectly orchestrated, eloquent performances? What if my subject is too intense, my language too simple, my grammar too ungrammaticable?

What if I come across as too negative (the only times I was inspired to write were when I was pissed off), too vain (after all, who cares what I think?), or shamefully ignorant to what everyone in the world OBVIOUSLY knows, that I, as a blogger, should be a reliable source of? 

What if they hate me for ending my sentences in prepositions?

Although William wasn’t textbook talented, polished, or in any conventional standards, a magnetic force, he was simply being himself without harming anyone, enjoying what he did with reckless abandonment, and therefore getting the point.

I’m not William Hung.  He’s a tough act to follow.  I know what you’re thinking.

What can I expect from someone who quotes William Hung? 

That she will give it her best and have no regrets. You can quote me on that.  😉

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